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I’m procrastingating so hard right now…and I hate it. I hate that feeling of just not being able to bring myself to do the stuff that I need to do. Also it’s stuff I really, really need to do for my life. Like finding a job, getting the VISA for my China trip in 3 weeks, doing the essay stuff for that trip (school trip) and so on. It’s stuff I can’t get around doing and procrastinating it only makes it worse and I know all that but still I can’t get myself to do it. Which makes me feel bad and that makes me procrastinating it only harder.

The Sandman dumped me

Just my way of complaining about my messed up sleep-awake rhythm. It’s 3:30 am and I’m jut starting to get tired after getting up at 2 pm. The worst part is that after I’ll be back on my swiss schedule during those next 3 weeks I’ll be leaving again. Having the same problem in Shanghai and then after another 3 weeks when I’m back home again.
I mean, I love traveling but that time zone shit and long flights stuff is so unnecessary.

Was the food so bad in the US of A?

Well…we didn’t want to go to an expensive restaurant..especially ‘cause my sister can’t eat gluten and is a vegetarian. Also we were on the road for days at a time and it was either what you can get at the gas station or fast food. We stayed with a friend of my sisters for 10 days and there the food was good, healthy and organic. Also they cooked in the hostel chain we stayed in (not every day but about 2 times a week they do) and that was good as well. But what really annoyed me was it either hasn’t got much of a taste or it’s too hot, at least most of the time.
So yeah, I’m really glad I’m back home, at least foodwise. I bought chia seeds though! Can’t get them in Switzerland so I’m gonna try those out soon =)

I should go buy some food. Haven’t eaten all day (only got up 2 hours ago) but still. I want good, healthy swiss food again. Where milk contains of milk, cheese is cheese (and not orange) meat is meat. I don’t like my food lying to me.

And then I should do my mountain of laundry.

I’m back home! =)

My 6 weeks roadtrip trough the US has come to an end and I’m home again. Feels weird but I’m also so much looking forward to cooking my own meals, actually eating veggies and fruit again and restarting working out.

I’ll upload some pictures tomorrow, because now I’m just dead tired (been up for something over 30 hours because I couldn’t sleep on the plain and I’m also having a little cold I got in San Francisco.

So yeah, this is basically a post about me not being dead and a promise that I’ll be more active agian =) I hope some of you guys haven’t given up on me this last half year…things were just crazy.

Got my tragus pierced! =) Wanted to do it for a long time now. We walked by some tattoo and piercing stores yesterday on haight street and I was like, okay I’m just gonna do it. Didn’t even really hurt, was more just “uncomfotable” for a moment. It still isn’t swollen that much and I really hope it’s days this way. It’s still weird that it’ll take 6-9 months to fully heal…
But now I got a cool souvenir from San Francisco ;)






this is me and it makes me want to rip my ribs out 

literally amount of times i feel so much stuff inside me i need to get it out but i dont know how


okay so I’m an art student and I really want to tell you all something very important: YOU DON’T NEED TO BE GIFTED TO EXPRESS YOURSELF. Many people that are well known artist started out just doing their thing even though others didn’t like it. And even if it’s just for you and you don’t show anybody, you should always try to find away to express yourself. their are so many different ways to do it. And let me tell you something else, every single project I do sucks so bad at the beginning, and after I’m halfway done and sometime until the day before I have to hand it in. A great deal of getting something great is failing again and again until you know all the ways how not to do it and then you’ll find a solution that’ll work. DON’T BE AFRAID OF FAILING. Especially at the beginning, because everybody does at that point. Just do your thing and don’t give a shit about anything else.
I’m still alive

OMG guys I’m so sorry for not having posted anything in such a long time! I’m on my road trip through the US and there were just other priorities. Like checking where to go and sleep the next day, what to see and so on.
I’m in LA at the moment. I promise I will make a really big post when I get back in 3 weeks, with pictures and everything.

So yeah, I hope your summer is as amazing as mine has been so far and enjoy the good weather! ;)


have you ever loved a lyric so much that when you hear it feels like your heart is trying to burst out of your body

kannieschrijfnie replied to your post “Only one more day and the adventure begins!”

I wish you a very good and safe trip Miriam and of course the same for your sister. Take care of yourselves and enjoy every moment if this trip. You do what a lot of oeople only think about. Awesome. See you soon back!

Thanks a lot! =) I still can’t believe it though…I just waited for this for years!

Only one more day and the adventure begins!

It’s kind of funny, I love planning a trip, but I hate the actual packing.
I’m putting together music for the road, but it’s so hard to decide what to put on a cd and what to leave out.

And I have a lot of cleaning and tidying to too as well. I still can’t believe that I’ll be in New York tomorrow at this time and that I’ll see so much of the US and finally doing an actual roadtrip!! But I had soooooo incredibly much to do for school until yesterday evening that I don’t even feel like having holiday…I just hope the realisation fo what is to come sinks in soon so that I get all excited again! =)

I’m now on my day 2 too and sore from head to toe. The pain is no joke

It’ll get better real quick! A week after that I didn’t get sore anymore by this workout. I really whish I hadn’t stop doing the challenge…Gonna pick it up again when summer break starts on saturday =) You just keep going!! =)

I had the best dream last night!

Well it kind of started out weird (all my dreams are weird and don’t question how things morph into each other or sudden plot twist I have a complex mind that doesn’t have to make sense, okay?)
So I was at a school with a group of people (knew them in the dream but don’t actually know them) and we were kicking off the walls and sliding over the hallway. I was kinda good at this which impressed a kinda cute guy.[…]
We were sitting on the floor in a doorway and talking and then he kinda leans in to kiss me and I lean in a little too and then hes’ like:” You’re just gonna kiss me like that? You don’t even know me.” Or something alike. And I don’t really remember my answer but I was a little embarrassed but also said something like:”Well I just thought I’d use the chance”.
We we’re together now and there was some bigger plot going on that I don’t remember but it was something like going to fight something off. During these phase he held me, hugged me from behind, lay his arm around my shoulder, said cute stuff and looked at me like I was the most amazing thing and he couldn’t believe he’d found me. (I don’t wanna brag it’s just the best way to explain that kind of look that tugged something deep inside me)

And then I woke up. The […] indicate phases I don’t remember btw. So this was an amazing dream and nothing I usually dream. We didn’t even kiss but I felt so loved and actually in love…it was just really weird to wake up and not be the person in the dream or with that person…I got sad pretty quickly after waking up because it made me feel alone and like I just lost a person I once new.

It really showed me what I really want to have in my life again. I want to be looked at that way, I want touches and simple gestures to burn but also give me peace deep inside of me. To feel cared for, protected, cherished.

Damn, 2 years is too much time to be alone.

Okay this was incredibly personal and I don’t really know why i post this here but I just feel like sharing this.

rule to live by
Notte Themes     ☾